when He appears

"Now little children, abide in Him, so that when He appears, we may have confidence and not shrink away from Him in shame at His coming...Beloved, now we are children of God, and it has not appeared as yet what we will be. We know that when He appears, we will be like Him, because we will see Him just as He is." 1 John 2:28, 3:2

I've been thinking a lot about these few verses for a little while now.  In Focus (our weekly training session), we talked about Jesus' second coming, which was an interesting discussion. I find eschatology fascinating, and have done several studies on Revelation. But the thing that gets me every time is when it hits me anew: He is coming back for me. He is coming back, and I will see Him face to face. I know for some people this would inspire fear and trembling, but for me, my heart jumps and I smile. The longing to see Him face to face increases as I realize, this is not my home. God gives us things to enjoy and to show us Himself while we are on this earth, but soon we will be Home.

All the more reason to "abide in Him". I want to live a life that is pleasing to God. I don't want to "shrink away from Him in shame" when He comes. That image is just so pathetic. Like a dog with his tail between his legs. I want my heart to be pure, and to know that my life was not waisted on things that don't matter, but was spent running after the Lord and His ways. And I'm not there completely (really, who is?), but I still look forward to His coming with joy and excitement!

How do you feel about meeting Jesus?

on my way to Nineveh

I've been going to the women's Bible study at my church here at home in the 'Burg.  I wasn't planning on going, but decided last minute, about an hour before the first meeting, interestingly enough.  We're going through Priscilla Shirer's study on Jonah, a "life interrupted".  My life has been full of interruptions, or "divine interventions". Basically my plans don't go...well, according to plan! The story of my life, in the last few years at least, has been to let go of my need to plan, and to know what is coming. But I digress...

Basically you have Jonah, a prophet of Israel. He's all fine and good doing his daily thing, and then God says, "I want you to go to Nineveh to tell them about Me!" Nineveh, the place of Jonah's enemies, where they are really mean (understatement) and there's a good chance they'll kill you (not an understatement!). So we know the story. Jonah says "heck no!" and gets on the first ship bound the other direction and three times as far away.  A storm comes, they throw him overboard, he gets swallowed by a giant fish and given a second chance to complete the mission that God has called him to.  And he's obedient, the second time around.

During this study, Priscilla asked us to think about what our "Nineveh" is, the people we know God is telling us to reach out to but we are reluctant to.  For the longest time I wasn't really sure what that was for me. I'm just living at home, going to church.  All my family knows the Lord, who on earth do I have to "reach out" to?  Then I realized, my Nineveh doesn't look like what she described.  Mine is different. My "Nineveh" isn't really reaching out to people, but it is doing something that God is telling me to that I'm not really excited about and have been putting off for a while.

The whole reason I'm here is to get a new visa and work on raising more support to go back to England. I was also hoping to get a job to earn a little extra money.  But then, we moved right when I got home, and I was busy for the first few weeks.  Talk about an interruption! Then I wasn't feeling well. Then there were things planned for the next few weekends to prepare for.  Then I found more and more excuses not to contact people. I knew I should get around to working on support, but what's the rush, right? More excuses, and then, oh hey, its November! 

This has shown me that yes, I did have some legitimate reasons to begin with.  Moving is stressful. Not living the house I called "home" anymore is considered a loss, and I needed time to emotionally deal with that before engaging the real world. But now God is showing me my "Nineveh", and calling me to do my part to go back to England. I can't be disobedient anymore.  Even if I finally get a temporary job offer that will bring in some money. Which I did, and had to turn down.  Just because something is good doesn't mean we can use it as an excuse to disobey what God is actually calling us to do.  So my friends, please pray for me! There's a reason why I've been putting this off.  It's hard work. It's uncomfortable. It's impossible for me to do on my own.  But God desires my obedience more than other "good things" that I think I have to offer Him. And I know from experience, He will not leave me hanging!

So, we know what my "Nineveh" is, what's yours?

rocking the boat.

Sometimes, when everything seems to be going so well, things happen to rock the boat.  It's smooth sailing, and suddenly a storm comes and you wonder if you will see the other side of it.

I've got two more months here, and then I will be on my way back home.  I'll be there for a few months, trying to raise the support and get a visa to come back.  But that's not the point of this post.  While I've been looking forward to going home and seeing my family, I am ok with the amount of time I have left here.  I have things to finish up, places to go, people to see, and I'm looking forward to all of that.  I've been happy stay here for two more months: until yesterday.

Yesterday was when the storm came.  It is already calming down, but it seriously rocked the boat and made me wish I was back home already.  It made me wish that I wasn't separated from the people I love the most by an ocean.  It made me wish I had money for a plane ticket (or a TARDIS, I'm not picky) and could drop everything and run to see the people I love.  It made me wish that I was not here.

My Dad was supposed to have a surgery that was pretty routine, just supposed to last for a half hour or so, to clean out his sinuses.  Four hours later the doctor came out and told my mom his airways had collapsed and they had to do an emergency tracheotomy. He is doing better now, still with a trach and still in ICU, but stable and the doctor wants to attempt the surgery again tomorrow.

I was just so shocked: this was not supposed to happen.  He was not supposed to almost die.  The surgery was supposed to happen quickly to fix a problem, not cause more problems.  The storm was so sudden and came out of nowhere, and I am so far away, that yesterday was hard to handle.

When He got into the boat, His disciples followed Him. And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being covered with the waves... (Matt 8:23-24)


Being fishermen, I'm sure they knew that storms could brew up at any time, but they probably didn't know there was going to be a storm that day.  They just followed Jesus.  When the storm came, out of nowhere, they were afraid. But Jesus was with them.  He calmed the wind and the waves with just a few words, and quicker than it began, the storm was gone.


I guess the point of all this is, that I know Jesus is with me.  I know He is with my family, and He holds us in the palm of His hand.  People are praying, and God is moving. Every time I worry, I try and turn it to prayer. I try not to waste energy worrying about things that I cannot change.


So, if you remember us, could you lift us up in prayer?  The waves are still a little choppy.

the Law.

Can I just say I'm so glad Jesus came?  My journey through the Bible in 90 days is going well so far, I've only missed one day out of ten.  Let me tell you, it has been a struggle.  My head gets heavy as I read the lists of "and this is how you should make it", and "this is what you shall do", and "if a man sins, let him bring an offering of..."  But I try and pay attention, because this is important.  There is a reason why God repeats Himself time and time again.  He is a Perfect, Holy, and Just God, He has a right to have things done His way.  As I read through Exodous and Leveticus, and continue to read through the Old Testament, I give thanks for Jesus.  I thank God that He sent His Son so we can be grafted in to the family of God, so we don't have to make sacrifices every time we sin, or do something incorrectly.  We don't have to be unclean anymore.  Jesus is the perfect answer to the Law.  The blood of animals cannot take away sins, but the blood of Jesus can.

the Bible in 90 days...

I moved (or "moved house" as they say here), and will be sans housemate until sometime in April.  Part of me is happy about this, because it means more time alone.  The other part of me is not so happy about this, as it means more time alone.  So what am I going to do with this time all on me onesies?

I've been inspired and well, convicted.  My whole life as a Christian, I have been unable to form successful "quiet time" habits.  I have a rough time making spending time with the Lord a priority.  So, while I have this time alone, I am going to try and read the whole Bible cover to cover in 90 days.  This sounds insane to me.  I've tried to read it in a year, and don't even get through Genesis.  But, I really feel like this is something I should try.  And maybe it seems more do-able to me because its only for 90 days, not 360.  Anyways, I've done the first day, and am already on Genesis 17.

Have you ever tried a Bible reading plan? How did it go?